Sunday, February 7, 2010

In Defense of Obama 3 -- This No Longer Has Anything to Do with Obama

Alright. I know what you’re going to say. “What are you doing talking to this guy still?” I have no good reason. I just have a bad case of the Schadenfreudes.

This argument no longer has anything to do with anything except the sick twisted pleasure I get from it. Here is the 3rd installment of the Gabe vs. Alan series:

Alan Lastnameremoved

I don’t argue with homess people either….as soon as I read your joke of a resume, I realized that you are pathetic and destitute and there is no point in trying to educate you. Its like you are a dog watching a TV….you know something is going on but you are not sure what it is.

7 hours ago

Jenny Lastnameremoved

This should cheer everybody up!!http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=108290565853047&ref=mf

7 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

Thank you so much for that Jenny. That was heartwarming and put me in a good mood.

Alan,

Few bullet points I wanted to shoot your way

• What are homess people? And why are you bringing them up? This is known as irrelevant material.

• That wasn’t a joke of a resumé. It was a joke resumé. If you would have read the whole thing you would have realized that.

• Why do you assume that I am destitute. I don’t have two cars, but what kind of jack ass would I be if I bought two cars? I can only drive one.

• I like how you say there is no point in trying to educate me. I’ve tried to educate you on multiple instances by showing you cold hard data from respected sources, and you’ve decided to turn a blind eye. How is it that you interpret this as uneducable?

• Great analogy. I like how you linked opinion to real life. Unfortunately, you still have yet to make one factual claim. You’re not gonna win a lot of debates this way.

7 hours ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

A guy who thinks “serving his country” is joining the Americorps” shouldn’t use the word “bullet”. Save your energy for finding a job Gabe…..that way you can pay some tax money and feel good about how the money is spent.

6 hours ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

OH, and your band….It sounds like someone is torturing a goat!!!

6 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

First off, you have never heard my band. If you’re talking about Jenny Sizzler, you don’t know what you’re talking about. Are you aware that your nephew plays in that band?

And you’re right. Working for a wage below the national minimum in order to help homeless Americans, some being veterans, surely isn’t serving your country. You have to kill people to serve your country, right? Volunteering in the most dangerous city in the country isn’t enough, right? Gotta have a gun to do good.

6 hours ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

OK, Gabby….either you name is pronounced “Gabby” or it should be spelled Gayb, like Gayboy…since your into english I though you might agree. And….really…go get a job…I’m sure you have 10’s of thousands of dollars in student loans to pay off. Come talk to me when you pay some taxes and we can debate how the money is spent. Since you got a degree in philosophy and english…good luck with that job thing…..back to stacking crates of veggies I guess.

6 hours ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

Oh, I’m sending Steve a check for more music lessons. See….you did do some good today!!

6 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

Alan,

First of all, working in a warehouse is a real job. Any job where you go home covered in sweat after working in refrigerators for 12 straight hours is a real job. You obviously don’t realize that many Americans wear their blue collars proudly.

Secondly, this is something like your third allusion to paying taxes. This conversation was never about taxes. And you’re contradicting yourself by bringing them up. First you showed that your mindset is one where nothing is more important than money. Then you reinforced this ideal by naming expensive possessions you have. Then you bring up paying taxes. Guess what. The really rich don’t even pay taxes. They influence government with the use of lobbyists. Your ideals have you chasing material possessions, and you’ll always be chasing these things because someone will always have a newer Corvette than you. (Even though everyone knows new Corvettes are garbage compared to what they used to produce.). So I wish you luck on your journey to everlasting jealousy and disappointment.

And go ahead and just start typing ur for both you’re and your. Sure it says, “I probably don’t know the difference between you’re and your,” but at least it holds onto that slim chance of doubtful intelligence. Better that everyone in the room think you’re stupid than for you to open your mouth and prove it.

5 hours ago ·

Rusty Russell

I have not laughed so hard in a very long time. :)

4 hours ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

Gabby, you are really so stupid that you should just stop talking. Get a job, pay back your student loans and contribute something to the country. I know your first instinct is to run your mouth then just grab your family and leave your country when things get tough like your relatives did…..refugees are different than revolutionaries….sorry to have to tell you that!

4 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

Alan,

I want you to know that no one who is reading this thinks I’m stupid, except you. Time and time again you have changed the topic to something else you know less than me about. My first instinct isn’t to run. Along with my ancestors, I usually wait until my life or one of my family member’s lives is at stake. One thing I don’t run from is ignorant people who result to name calling when they have been intellectually bested.

Refugees are different than revolutionaries, but they’re not mutually exclusive. One person can be one of these things, both of these things, or neither of these things. Therefore, pointing out that they’re different has not in any way shape or form shown that my ancestors weren’t both of these things. For example, a douchebag is something totally different than an asshat, but you are both of these things.

You’re digging your hole deeper and deeper. Ask Rusty Russel. He’s not laughing just at the situation. He’s also laughing directly at you, your incredibly fallacious arguments, and your pettiness.

Oh I get it. Gabby is a girl’s name. That’s the most clever thing you’ve come up with. I mean, barring making fun of dead people. That’s really clever. And it’s pretty hard to do, since they can’t stand up for themselves.

Now which one of us is the coward?

3 hours ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

If you are so smart….why are you a broke ass with no job? The economy is just as bad for me as it is for you. I have a job and got offered 2 more jobs last week both for over 120k a year. If you get much smarter I fear you might starve to death without welfare!!

3 hours ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

oh…and your the coward….come kick my ass….i’ll buy you a ticket!!

3 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

Once again, Alan, I am not broke. I’ve told you already that I planned ahead and saved up money to responsibly allot for my time being unemployed.

We all understand that you have a job, and I’m happy for you that you had two more jobs offered last week. I know how important money is to those who are phallically challenged, so I wish you the best with those opportunities.

And which of the Fox News members told you that having a job was a sign of intelligence. I’ve worked with people who were dumber than rocks, but they worked hard so they were allowed to keep their job. Please show me your equation or your premises that come to the conclusion of intelligence = employment.

Fuck it. Show me any equation. Any equation at all.

And I’m the coward? You’re picking a fight with someone at least ten years younger than yourself, insulting dead people, and I’m the coward. Why do I need a ticket? Pick me up in your 4×4 and your Corvette at the same time. And wear your Rolex. God, two guys in a Corvette… Everyone is going to think you like dudes.

3 hours ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

Your like one of those yappy little dogs, all bark no bite.I know you are proud to not have a job. Typical socialist. Its time to put up or shut up. Get a job or come kick my ass!!

3 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

See the thing about thinking rationally, Don, is that I can see beyond your little traps. You are convinced that there are only two sides to every dice. Well guess what. This is facebook, and showing the world how vapid you are doesn’t require me to have a job or come kick your ass.

Odds are I couldn’t kick your ass. While you’ve been doing pushups and lifting weights I’ve been wasting my time reading books and articles and filling my brain with facts, or at least well-formed intellectual opinions. I choose to stay right here and continue showing you up.

Also, hit me up on your real account, Don. We all know that you’re hiding behind your brother’s facebook mask.

And you would’ve gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for this meddling kid!

3 hours ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

Your so stupid…you don’t even know who you are talking to. What a complete fucking moron…you really are too stupid to live. Meddling kid gives you the credibility of scooby doo and shaggy….too bad that is light years beyond you!

3 hours ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

Dice is plural….its die Einsrein!

3 hours ago

Gabe Caruso

You did it. I was waiting for it, and it finally paid off. I knew that eventually you would start a reply with a grammatical error. It only took one word for you to prove your prowess as facebook’s greatest literary delinquent. Then you called me a “complete fucking moron.” Sounds like a great premise. Can’t wait to hear the conclusion.

“you really are too stupid to live.” Here we have what is called a self-defeating statement. The very fact that I am alive proves that either

a) i’m not too stupid to live, so being alive, I’m not stupid or

b) you’re too stupid to come up with a legitimate argument.

Meddling kid was a direct allusion to Scooby Doo, (again with the capitals,) so you pointing that out doesn’t really hurt my credibility at all. And how is that light years beyond me? Are you even aware that light year is a measurement of distance and not time? Please explain to me how Scooby and Shaggy are millions of miles beyond me. I’m confused. Not stupid, just having a hard time understanding your idiocy.

Then you clicked post, and then you realized that dice was plural. You had me! You had the opportunity to get on the scoreboard and set the score at Gabe 99 Alan 1, and you jumped at it! You had it too, until everything began to fall apart after three words. “Its” should have been “It’s” since you were trying to make the contraction of it and is, and not talking about the attributes of it, and then the wheels fell off. You went for a eight letter word and completely butchered it. Einstein was a great genius, but Einsrein was just a word created by an intellectual inferior to showcase his lack of genuine intelligence. It was a good try, but a complete failure.

Please, give me more ammunition. I look forward to further embarrassing you in a public forum. Not that you need my help.

about an hour ago ·

Alan Lastnameremoved

Say all you like…the facts don’t change…you are a broke ass with no job and worthless degrees. You are from coward stock that abandoned their country. Your Cuban relatives would be ashamed of you. Get a job, pay taxes and pay off your student loans! You are part of the problem not the cure!

about an hour ago

Jenny Lastnameremoved

O.K. you don’t like SIZZLER?? You’ll love this.http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/4219322

about an hour ago

Alan Lastnameremoved

cute…

about an hour ago

Gabe Caruso

Why is it so important to you that I get a job and pay taxes? I’m pretty sure that this is a free country and it isn’t against the law to be jobless. You’re right about the facts not changing, but that doesn’t work in your favor. You’re still a homophobic materialistic racist who only finds self worth in possessions, and I’m just a college grad. I’d much rather be jobless in my shoes than be you. Now tell us how strong you are and list some more of your possessions. It won’t make you any more respectable or credible, or correct for that matter, but it’ll make you feel better.

Pretty sure this isn’t over. Pretty sure he just went to bed.

We’ll see.

[Via http://soygabe.wordpress.com]

No comments:

Post a Comment